Precious Malicious Sisterhood
by Ember411
Summary: Precious Malicious Sisterhood. That time when girls are not themselves, especially when together. That time when guys are confused and have no idea what is going on with girls. What will happen when you mix PMS girls and confused guys at one setting? Rated T for swearing and dirty details (guy reviewers, be warned!)
1. Tampons, Stores, Chocolate, Screaming

**Hey guys! **

**HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!**

**So the other day on Youtube I was watching one of my favorite teenage cartoon shows, 6teen. I. LOVE. THAT. SHOW! I suggest you go on Youtube, find the first episode and watch it because it's so funny.**

**And if you've seen the show already…. You know how funny it is.**

**So ' Precious Malicious Sisterhood' is inspired by the episode Enter The Dragon.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

**Warnings: Major OOC-ness!**

**I'm sorry, but its how it worked out in the story!**

* * *

A month into a I'm-so-bored-just-kill-me-now, oh-my-God-I'm-going-to-kill-my-boyfriend-so-much-n obody-will-suspect-his-death-as-a-result-of-me, Sugar was throwing a fourth of July party in her backyard.

With the exception of Quinn, who was at home with her mother for the night, and Tina for personally reasons, the girls all slept over Sugar's house on the third to start the celebration early.

* * *

At the sleepover the girls sat in her huge bedroom watching the Sex and the City movie. Santana was munching on a bowl of chocolate (next to her was a bowl of cheese doodles and another bowl filled with Pringles), Brittany was sleeping on Sugar's giant teddy bear, Kitty was messaging someone on the phone, Marley had crossed arms as she glared at the television, Rachel was in the bathroom and Sugar was out of the room and in the kitchen.

"Santana can I have some of your food?" Kitty asked. "Like the damn cheese doodles?"

"Back off!" Santana yelled. "I need this."

"Can I have some Pringles?" Marley asked.

"No." Santana barked.

"Is…the movie….over?" Brittany yawned. "I'm so sleepy…where's Lord Tubbington?"

"Rachel get your damn face away from the mirror! It's normal for a girls face to get acne." Santana yelled.

"Not this much acne though!" Rachel screamed. "I'm like the human crater of red volcanoes!"

"Oh be quiet you acne head!" Kitty yelled. "God you're so annoying."

"Says who little miss cheese doodle fingers?" Rachel snapped.

Santana turned and saw Kitty eating the cheese doodles. "You bitch!"

"RACHEL!" Sugar yelled running into the room. "Rachel throw me a tampon!"

"There aren't any in here, use the downstairs or your Moms." Rachel yelled back.

"Sugar what's with the hot dog in your hand?" Brittany asked. "Are you making food? You better keep that away from Santana. I don't want any sweet lady kisses from a fat lady."

"Is Tan Hawk on her period?" Kitty asked. "Oh god, not her too!"

"Meaning what?" Sugar asked.

"What do you think!?" Marley yelled. "Kitty has hers too! And so do I!"

"Explains why your acting like a bitch—" Rachel commented, before being hit my a flying pillow. "Marley Rose!"

"I HAVE CRAMPS! SHUT UP RACHEL!" Marley screeched.

"God, we became those bitches that get their periods all at the same time." Santana said. "Except Britt, Quinn and I. We've always been on the same schedule. Now Berry is catching up?"

"Santana this is no time for joking," Rachel said. "I'm assuming Brittany is on hers now?"

"Uh huh." Santana answered.

"We needs cramp tampons—"

"AND PADS!" Marley yelled, holding her waist and bending down. "AND CRAMP RELIEF'S!"

"Oh God, your legs are closed and you don't even use a tampon? Boobless it's not the same as a penis." Kitty remarked. "Hawk, stop sticking that dog in your mouth and sucking it like Leprechaun's dick."

Sugar stopped and threw the hot dog away. "Someone go to the store and get some things!"

"Who the hell wants to drive in the middle of this fucking storm!?" Santana yelled. "And while we're at it get more chocolate!"

"I NEED MY MEDS!" Marley screeched. "OH GOD I HATE THESE CRAMPS!"

"Fine, I'll go!" Sugar yelled. "I'm the hostess."

"Send Berry to the store, you'll just fuck the store clerk." Kitty said. "Damn cramps!"

"I'm so bloated!" Brittany cried.

"Oh God me too!" Santana yelled. "Where the hell is my chocolate!?"

"Alright alright," Sugar said. "How about we all go to the store and get— What if the clerk is a GUY?"

"Just send one of the boys to the store." Brittany said. "Why not Finn?"

"Frankaweenie won't know what to do—Santana said.

"He grew up with his mom—"

"Trust me," Rachel said. "Carol didn't send Finn to the store to get her tampons and stuff."

"Aren't guys suppose to not know how disgusting girls are?" Marley asked.

"She's got a point," Sugar turned to Rachel. "I don't need Rory to think I'm dirty!"

"Fine fine, we all go to the store." Rachel said. "We buy whatever we need, then we go to the cashier. If it's a guy—Santana can go Lima Heights on him. Sugar can we use your Dads card?"

"Sure, he won't mind." Sugar said. "Since he and Mom went to Boston for the fourth, and the household keepers are on vacation, I do whatever I want with Daddy's card."

"Does that include Magic Mike?" Santana asked.

"More like…Magic Rory." Brittany laughed, then yawned. "Me so sleepy…Santana you know what I usually have…get it for me?"

* * *

Fifteen minutes later in Sugar's ten seat-er van, the girls arrived at a local store to get their stuff. They all went inside the store and got what they needed for the rest of the night. The cashier was, luckily, a girl and cashed them out.

On the way home the girls were munching on their foods when Rachel notice Kitty. "Kitty, are you crying?"

"SHUT UP!"

"What's wrong?"

"I HATE THESE CRAMPS, I HATE BEING BLOATED!" She cried again, leaning her head into Marley's shoulder.

"Someone's a crybaby on her period…"

"I HEARD THAT SANTANA!" Kitty cried out with tears.

Back at Sugar's house the girls were laughing, enjoying themselves and singing songs whilst watching movies. Santana found the Motta's alcohol cabinet and brought the bottles upstairs.

Soon enough everyone was drunk off their butts. Santana and Brittany were kissing, Kitty was running around screaming at everyone, Rachel was dancing her butt off, Sugar was screech screaming and Marley was singing loudly to dirty songs.

They did some other activities too, nothing sexually though...

* * *

Hours later in the early dawn the girls woke up. Brittany was the first to the bathroom and discovered something.

"Girls." She said into the room. "We're out of tampons!"

"What?" Rachel asked, "we can't be out of tampons. We bought some last night—"

"What the hell happened to the tampons?" Santana screamed.

"I think I know." Marley said, looking out the window. "Look."

The girls went to the large window and saw pink and white things on the ground. They all ran downstairs to the backyard and saw their opened and non-opened tampons on the ground. Covered with feathers and glitter, with a tag attached to the strings.

_2: SAM_

_FROM: BRITTANY_

"Britt, what did you do?" Santana asked.

"I swear they were pigeons on the ground that needed glitter to fly. So I added glitter and colorful feathers to make them beautiful and send them out to Sam to ask him if he would bring over his fluffy pillow for me to sleep on." Brittany said.

"Let's get more."

"We can't!" Sugar yelled. "Daddy sent me a message last night…look!" She held her phone up.

Sugar…DO NOT USE MY CREDIT CARD! I will be home tomorrow and buy with money.

Love Daddy.

"Anyone got dollars on them?" Marley asked. Everyone shook their head. "SHIT!"

"I'm calling Quinn. She can get things for us and bring them." Rachel said, leaving to call Quinn.

"Until then, what do we use?" Sugar asked.

"I bought pads—" Marley said, Kitty cried. "Oh what now?"

"I NEED A TAMPON PENIS! NOT A FUCKING BED THINGY!" Kitty sat down and cried. "AND MY CRAMPS ARE BACK! AND WE USED UP ALL THE CRAMP MEDS!"

"Who—" Sugar was about to ask, when she turned and saw in the large pool she owned and saw floating pink boxes. "Brittany!"

"I thought it was Spongebob and Patrick's daughters wanting to go back home to their Daddies." Brittany said. "So I came out and threw them in the water to go home…I thought the pool connected to the ocean."

"With what?" Kitty bawled. "And underground pipe?"

"Yes."

Rachel came back, pissed off. "She's out with her aunt and both Quinn and her aunt forgot their phones at home." She stomped her foot. "And my acne is worse!"

"So…what do we do?" Brittany asked.

"Use my pads for now," Marley said. "I don't mind…and we'll call Quinn in a little while."

* * *

All of the girls shrugged, knowing it was their only choice. Inside the girls changed into new clean clothes and sat in the living room eating their chocolate chip pancakes. Around ten Finn called.

"Hey, we'll all be over in an hour." He said.

"Okay," Rachel hung up. "The guys are coming over."

"As long as we stay calm, I'm sure they won't freak….PRETTY LITTLE LAIR! DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH MY FUCKING CHEETOS!"

"SANTANA STOP SCREECHING AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS."

* * *

**Oh cheese and crackers, what are the boys walking into?**

**Read and review**

**Thanks :)**


	2. Boys Arrival

**Hey guys!**

* * *

The guys all drove over to Sugar's mansion home around an hour later. Packed with burgers, hot dogs, cheese, lawn chairs, ice coolers, beach towels to sit on later and variety of chips for snacking on and stuff.

"Where's Puck?" Mike asked Finn.

"Puck's off doing his own thing for a while, he'll be over before the fireworks go off though." Finn answered helping Artie out of the passenger seat and into his wheelchair.

"I'm so excited to be celebrating the American Independence Day!" Rory cheered as he and Sam got out of Sam's truck. "I hope it's as fun as I've seen on television."

"Dude, do the Irish do anything or….was that a rumor I heard? Since it's the American Holiday." Sam questioned.

"Hey Jake need a ride home or is Kitty giving you one?" Ryder asked jumping out of his truck and going to the back to get the things he brought.

"Sleeping at Kitty's. You sleeping at Marley's?" Jake asked.

"She's sleeping over mine since my folks are out of the house. She's telling her Mom she's sleeping here again though."

"Mom says as long as I have a condom and I call and let her know where I am, she doesn't care where I go."

The guys all got to the front of Sugar's house and knocked. Nobody answered though. They tried once more before Sam's phone rang. It was Santana.

"THE DOOR IS FUCKING OPENED! JUST WALK IN! AND GIVE ME FOOD!"

"Well someone's in a happy mood." Sam said after he hung up. "I'll wait with Artie out here for the gate."

* * *

The guys walked inside and found themselves shivering in the cold. All the AC's were turned on high as well as all the fans. They found all the girls in the living room sitting on the dark red couches, looking calm and cooled down a little. Rachel was reading a magazine, Marley was reading one of her books, Kitty was filing her nails, Brittany was sleeping, Santana was chomping down foods.

"Hey girls…what's up?" Finn asked. "Sugar where should we put these bags of foods?"

"Kitchen." Sugar said.

"Why are you all inside? I know it's like, ninety, but you should go in the pool—" Jake said before getting slapped by Kitty. "Ow! Kitty!"

"Shut it Three Nipples." Kitty remarked. "Give me those chips—"

"Doritos? Mine!" Santana yelled.

"You have those cheese doodles!" Kitty screeched.

"BITCH I WANT MT DORITOS!"

"Ryder why do you have a gallon of chocolate milk?" Rachel looked over and saw the chocolate milk gallon.

"Oh," Ryder held up the drink. "Since Marley doesn't like soda or drinking water all the time I thought she'd—"

Marley stood up and took the milk gallon and began chugging it down. Chugging and chugging and chugging the whole gallon of milk until the very last drop. She held the gallon down swallowing the last in her mouth and licking her lips of the milk around her mouth.

"—like it." Ryder finished slowly. "Got enough milk?"

"I wanna go swimming!" Sam yelled from outside. "Brittany! BRITTANY! Let's go swimming!"

"She's sleeping!" Rachel yelled.

"I'm confused…. Is she dating Sam or Santana?" Marley asked.

"Santana and Brittany agreed to a Summer Fling, like Sugar and Rory." Mike answered.

"What!?" Sam yelled, not hearing for the fifth time.

"SHE'S. FUCKING. SLEEPING!" Santana screeched. "TROUTY MOUTH JUST SHUT UP AND GO SWIMMING!"

"Did I just hear sweet cloud lips and spicy lips speaking?" Brittany woke up from her nap. "Where's Sweet Man and Spicy Lady?"

"Chomper is swimming and the Spanish Chomper is eating her fifth bag of cheese doodles." Kitty said. She felt Jake lift her up and start carrying her. "PUT ME DOWN!"

"Santana, you're kind of eating a lot of cheesy junk food—" Finn said. Santana threw the remote at him.

"SHUT UP!"

"Come on let's swim!" Jake cheered, still carrying Kitty.

"In my clothes?"

"More fun!"

Kitty nudged him in the chest, causing him to drop her. "OW! DAMN YOU! That hurt!"

Kitty stepped on his foot and left in a beat to sit next to Rachel. Arms crossed and holding one of her middle fingers up at Jake.

Soon Finn, Rory and Ryder were trying to get their girl to swim too. Marley ended up screaming at Ryder: LET GO OF ME! I JUST DRANK FIVE HUNDRED HOURS OF MILKING COWS!

Rachel yelled: No! My makeup will wash off! I worked hard for this look!

Sugar kept trying to get Rory to go to her room. "I don't care if this is a summer fling or not, I just wanna get on."

"Sugar I'm not going to 'ave sex with you since I'm 'ere until the end of August!"

Eventually Rory got Sugar off of him, but not without being called "A silly stupid dancing munchkin.", Marley was back at her book and Rachel went back to her magazine.

* * *

Once the boys were outside the girls tried Quinn again. But nobody answered the house, nor did she answer her phone. They tried Kurt and Blaine, knowing that the two openly gay guys wouldn't mind getting stuff for them. But neither of the boys answered their phone.

Outside the boys all jumped in and swam around, with the exception of Artie who sat in a floating chair and tried to avoid being in the middle where all the activity was being held.

"So the girls were being pretty weird." Finn said. "Think they're okay?"

"I guess. Doesn't it take a girl, like, two hours to 'wake up' after they wake up?" Jake asked.

"Sounds like something girls do." Sam said.


	3. For Cory

Hey guys.

So I'm sure you've all heard the news.

Our Finn has passed away on 7/13/2013.

Although the first episode of Glee I watched was "Born This Way" and have been watching the show since then, I have seen numerous videos of Glee's other seasons before Born This Way.

I learned about the characters and learned how they grew up each seasons.

I loved Finn! So nerdy and funny, but smart and wise.

It's going to be so hard for Season 5 and future episodes.

I want them to make a very good episode dedicated to Cory. He was a big part on the show, he basically was the show, and Glee will never be the same ever again.

My heart goes out to Cory's family and friends and Glee Family.

Especially to Lea Michele.

I heard a rumor that in two weeks, Lea and Cory were to be wed.

I'm heart broken to the ends.

But Cory is still with us in spirit; his voice and smile and magical talents.

Rest Easy Cory, You'll Always Be Loved And Remembered For Everything You Did.

**Cory Allan Michael Monteith **

_May 11, 1982 – July 13, 2013_


	4. Burgers, Irish and Ice Creams

**Hey so it's been a few days... because of Cory's death and stuff and this story, as any of you know, has Finchel in it.**

**Also can you guys, like, please review? Let me know that you think? Thanks.**

* * *

About an hour and a half later the guys got out of the pool and relaxing on the large patio deck while Finn made burgers and hot dogs on the grill. Most of the guys had gone back inside and tried to get the girls to come out but were either ignored or yelled at.

"What do we do about the girls? It's not fun without them." Sam said.

"For once I agree." Artie said. "The girls can be nags and complain about everything of every detail but they're generally fun to have around."

"I HEARD THAT YOU FUCKING DEAD WHEELS!" Santana screeched from inside. She then screamed something in Spanish and went quiet.

"What'd she say?" Artie asked.

"Something about pushing you down a hill and then something about Kitty touching her Cheeto's and going to kill Kitty for touching her cheeto's." Jake said.

"I think we should go inside and just drag them out. It'll be easy."

"Says you Ryder," Rory said. "Sugar will just drag me to her room."

"Ha! Sugar's horny!" Finn laughed from the grill.

"Guys I don't think it's a good idea." Mike commented.

"Me either." Joe agreed. "We can't just force them to do things. It's wrong."

"No what's wrong is this: Kitty is amazing hot when she's wet head to toe and I need to see her wet!" Jake exclaimed.

"Hey Rory, just put Jake and Sugar together. Jake can do a fake Irish accent and Jake can imagine Sugar is Kitty." Ryder laughed before getting his head slapped by Jake. "What!?"

Santana came out a few seconds later with fuzzy hair and sweat covering her body. "Trouty Mouth and Leprechaun, go to the damn store and get one of those huge ass Basket Robins tubs. You know the large brown ones that people bring to shitty school events like picnics."

"Why them? I'll go—" Mike said before Santana pushed him down.

"No, because Trouty Mouth can actually drive ON THIS SIDE OF THE DAMN ROAD and Potato Man Eating Virgin Getting It On With Sexual Sugar Tonight can PAY FOR THE MEAL!"

Sam got up, grabbing Rory by his shirt collar, "Let's go man. Maybe Britt will need something else."

"You start the car, I'll go ask the girls." Rory said.

* * *

Inside Rory gathered around the girls, who sat in a circle holding hands and looked like they were concentrating.

"Girls, Sam and I are heading to the store to get ice cream. Any flavor?"

The girls remained silent.

"Girls?" Rory asked. "Girls "Is this some sort of... Sisterhood thing?" Rory asked. "Never seen American girls do this, or imagine."

No answer, still. Rory went over to Rachel and shook her. "Rachel?"

"OH MY GOODNESS! GET YOUR SCOTTISH ACCENT, OUT OF HERE AND GET SOME CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM!" Kitty yelled.

"I want cookie dough!" Marley yelled.

"Strawberry for me!" Sugar yelled.

"I can only get enough for one flavor," Rory said. "Which one?"

"PICK ANY FLAVOR!" Kitty screeched. "OH MY GOD! THESE CRAMPS!"

"I have having these cramps." Brittany said, then going back to sleep.

"Cramps are the worse. Or maybe bloating... I wonder if Santana will mind if I have a cheese doodle..."

"She'll bite your head off!" Sugar claimed.

"You're telling me." Rachel added. "Marley how's my face?" She turned to the girl who sat next to her and Rory.

"Looks fine." Marley said. Marley took Rory's hands and made a puppy face. "Please? Get me Cookie Dough? Can you get cookie dough ice cream?"

"Eh, I don't know—"

"Anyone ever said you look like Colin Farrell and Evanna Lynch's loved child?" Marley asked, hoping he'd get her the flavor.

"What? She's like, 21, but...eh...I got a cousin that lives in Galway City and she looks very much like Eva—"

"IRISH POSER! Get THE DAMN VANILLA ICE CREAM OR I'LL—"

* * *

Rory ran out of the house, fearing Santana's threats. Inside Sam's truck Rory buckled in, breathing heavy.

"Dude, you okay?" Sam asked.

"Yes. Just... I don't know, things are insane."


End file.
